Of course, there is also the option of a closed or confidential adoption. That means the birth parents and the adoptive parents never know each other. You are only given background information about the birth mother and the birth father that will help you take care of the child, such as medical information.[8]

The Birth Mother’s Point of View

 

Adoption is exciting and wonderful and a little bit scary for you. For the birth mother (and possibly father), relinquishing a child for adoption may be the most difficult decision they have ever faced.

 

As you educate yourself about adoption, take a moment to go online to adoption resource sites such as www.adoption.org or www.adoption.com  and, instead of going to the “Getting ready to adopt” section, go to the “Are you pregnant and thinking about adoption?” section. It can be a tough read as you experience the birth mother’s fears and doubts and questions.

 

In an article written for women who are pregnant and considering adoption, Sharon Kaplan Roszia suggest that the birth mother consider the following issues with respect to prospective parents:

1.      What are their religious beliefs/value system?

2.      How many years of marriage/divorces and remarriages?

3.      Ages

4.      Will your child be the first or a subsequent child?

5.      What are the adoptive family looking for in an adoption and does it match your needs?

6.      Why are they adopting?

7.      What is their lifestyle; how do they play, work, etc.?

8.      What is their relationship with their extended family and how do they feel about adoption?

9.      What do the prospective adoptive parents know about adoption? Do they know anyone who is adopted, who has adopted a child, or has relinquished a child? Are they educating themselves?

10.  What type of parenting did they receive? Were they ever abused? Is there any history of alcohol or drug abuse in their family?

11.  Why were they attracted to each other and subsequently married? Have they had any separations or counseling for their marriage?

12.  How do they work out differences?

13.  What experiences have they had with children, either their own or other people's

14.  What kind of children do they enjoy?[9]

15.  Will you get to see their home and living environment?

How will you answer those questions?

 

With time and patience, we hope you will make that perfect connection that will bring you and your child together into a “forever family”.